The Garbageman Cometh

I hide from my garbage men.

Each Monday morning I glance back over my shoulder even before I am done waving at the departing school bus. I listen carefully, trying to reassure myself that there is no trace of a second, more sinister diesel engine already approaching from around the curve.

I choose to believe that my brisk gait lends me the appearance of a man eager to begin doing the many important tasks awaiting him at home.

I usually make it to the front walk before I hear the distant release of air brakes - to my ear a poorly bugled signal to attack.

Several long strides bring me to the front door and quickly inside. I slip out of my shoes and take up position on the landing halfway down the stairs to the basement. I look out the ground-level window. Safely in my trench, I steel my nerve, preparing to observe the inevitable hostilities.

My gaze lingers for a moment on my fearless gray infantry. My three heavy-duty 50 gallon Home Depot wheeled and lidded trash bins hold their position even as an enemy leaps at them from his still moving war machine.

The first bin is rolled in a tight arc and violently slammed into the back of the truck. The attacker bends and strains to heave it entirely into the back of the vehicle. Throwing the bin from side to side, the waste management menace backs away from the truck, pulling the hollow remains of my gutted soldier back into the daylight. The bin is given one final thrust and it rolls to the curb and topples, defeated, onto the lawn.

Now joined at the back of the truck by his accomplice, the two men stop and glare at our house. They know I'm here. Somewhere. Watching.

With much grunting and cursing the remaining two bins are heaved, slammed, rammed, scraped, spun, and vaulted.

They pause again and level a purposeful glare at the house. At me.

And then they are gone. But not for good. I know they will be back.

I know...because I pay them.

- ### -

Free advice: If you spend $170.00 to buy three heavy and awkward bins in an effort to deter ravenous raccoons and avoid the monthly fee for the hydraulically-liftable bins offered by your trash service, do not one day wander down your driveway and ask your garbage men if there is anything you can do to make collecting your trash easier. I certainly wont do that. Again.

CTV-DETOX

We are all slowly becoming accustomed to a relatively TV-free existence.

In the absence of Jon Stewart and Stephen Colbert, I am now depending solely on the BBC international to lull me to sleep.

Dana reports feeling generally more productive.

The kids have accepted that we are not punishing them. Our DVD collection is helping ease their pain. Chloe really misses Hanna Montana.

On the whole we have more music, more singing, more dancing, and more playing together.

We may still decide to plug back in to cable in the future, but perhaps we can develop some new habits in the mean-time.

The Grim RepairMan

We decided to try an experiment this Summer. We cancelled our cable TV at the end of April.

Summer was upon us. We would be playing outside, swimming, creating art and playing games. It would be good for the kids to have to invent some entertainment instead of defaulting to the television.

After four months of free cable the Comcast dude finally got around to disconnecting our service. So, uh, I guess we're going to try an experiment this Fall.

Sketch Comic

Welcome Mr. Sneakers

Mr. Sneakers is a "Snow" variety of Corn Snake. Masterfully named by the kids, he is 13 inches of solid entertainment. I'm told he can grow to be 4 feet in length, but will remain a harmless pet. Corn Snakes are excellent escape artists, so we are all learning to remain vigilant. I'm not sure how Evie the cat would react to a free range snake, but I have my suspicions.

Touch the Network

Apple rolls out the new iPod. Watch the guided tour.

One feature / partnership jumped out at me. Apple has partnered with Starbucks and will begin piloting a system that includes the ability to preview and purchase the last 10 songs played at the Starbucks you are sitting in. This is just the start of the kind of wireless interaction we will be having with our physical environments.

GPS technology, combined with your camera phone, will allow you to take a picture of the bar code on a product and find the lowest price on the item in a 5 mile radius.

Your future wireless device will always be on (like your cell phone today) so the network will reach out to you. Retailers will send coupons to your cell phone as you pass their store front. News sources and other services will send video, text and audio filtered using your preferences - some preferences that you declare, others that software agents in the network have learned about you. And the network will know if you are home or away, sending the media to your computer, your television, or to your mobile wireless unit.

I'm optimistic, and excited to use and create some of these services. However, in the interest of equal time, I point you to the ACLU who created a really cool simulation to caution us about a possible dark future of ubiquitous connectivity.

Finally, back on the topic of touching your technology, check out this series of very inpiring touch interface experiments.